do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
