My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize