do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
