Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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