My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Randomize