I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
