We're like a lot better than the average bears
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize