i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize