can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I skipped work to stalk him.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
