I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
