at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
