your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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