I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
She announced her abortion via fbk
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Randomize
