Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize