Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize