it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
