Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
