There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
