I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
