He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
