It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
