Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
