Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
