actually, I'm a sock model
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Green mimosas i think yes
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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