Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
is that a dick in a sweater?
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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