i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He? As in you personified your dick?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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