He had one of those small greek statue penises
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
