Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Randomize
