dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
