I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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