he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
she pinky promised me she was 18
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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