My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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