i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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