I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize