Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
