Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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