just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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