he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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