I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
