No awkward lesbian experiences without me
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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