I accidentally had phone sex last night
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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