My sheets look like a crime scene.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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