let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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