My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Mom said you looked used
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
