Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
