i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
