White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
