so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Randomize
