The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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