come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
You're earring is so big in my mouth
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
